The world as we know it

Hell in the middle of home

I had lots of childhood hells but one of the worst ones was between my bed & bedroom door. About 2/3 of the way to the door to be precise. This was the place where I would be glued in agony night after night when Dad was around. This was the place I was stuck with my stomach in my mouth, shaking uncontrollably, sobbing, as I could hear Mums screams whilst Dad bashed her. It was agony. Even to this day if I hear ads for domestic violence on the radio where there is screaming I have to change the channel, they are too painful to listen to.

I knew if I walked through my bedroom door into the hall Dad would see me & order me back to my room under threat of being hit. Bed offered no comfort & even with pillows & blankets I couldn’t block out Mums screams & cries for help as Dad yelled profanities at her & called her every foul name he could, whilst he hit her tiny 5 ft frame whilst she cowered from his blows pleading him to stop.

And so this point on the floor between my bed & my bedroom door was my hell, my excruciating limbo between not being able to block out my mothers agony & not being able to do anything to help her. It was soul destroying. The other kids I’m sure were the same. At times we would all come out of our rooms, one by one and huddled together in the hall, horrified, crying as he bashed her. Only to be ordered in threatening tones back into ours rooms.

At times we would cry at him, yelling ‘stop it’, ‘don’t hit her’ only again to be chased back into our rooms with his hand raised ready to hit as a backhander. He knew how to hit to make it hurt, and he knew how to do it so he wouldn’t break any bones. It was not till my mid twenties that I stopped ducking when anyone raised their hand, it took that long to retrain the reflex & and get over the fear and me ducking whenever a friend scratched their head had become quite embarrassing by that time.

As time went on dad was there less & less. When he was away there was a chance of happiness. When he was there it was simply constant terror.

Filed under: Governance

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We fight not to enslave, but to set a country free, and to make room upon the earth for honest men to live in. Thomas Paine

Above all, we must realize that no arsenal or no weapon in the arsenals of the world is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. RONALD REAGAN,
My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular. Adlai E. Stevenson Jr
If you want to be free, there is but one way; it is to guarantee an equally full measure of liberty to all your neighbors. There is no other. Carl Schurz
The First Amendment is often inconvenient. But that is besides the point. Inconvenience does not absolve the government of its obligation to tolerate speech. Justice Anthony Kennedy
Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one’s own person is its ultimate reward. Patricia Sampson
Many politicians are in the habit of laying it down as a self-evident proposition that no people ought to be free till they are fit to use their freedom. The maxim is worthy of the fool in the old story who resolved not to go into the water till he had learned to swim. Thomas Macaulay
The law will never make men free, it is men that have to make the law free. Henry David Thoreau
If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter. George Washington

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